i don’t know if this makes sense

i have walked these
dreadful feet through
mud filled with agony,
hate, hurt, burden, and
loss. at the end of
the hard walk, i’ve
still found myself
standing in a dark
tunnel of madness.

the best times for me
are always in my
silence wondering
about nothing. yet,
still figuring myself
out all at the same time.

feeling some type of
comfort after a breath
in those times of needing
myself rather than
anybody else.

because i am loner with a soul and a heart of stone

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august/september wrap-up, life update, and 6 months of love, and you?

hi hello hola! i am back!! i missed you all and it feels great to be back after a month of me gone. a lot has happened and i’m not sure i’m ready to talk about it. september was a really hectic month with everything i spoke about in my hiatus post, my birthday, and hurricane maria..it’s a lot to deal with at the moment but i’m happy to be back in my element again. it’s been a little over a month and i just wanted to come back so bad *cries for ever*

 

 

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if you are wondering why i mentioned hurricane maria or if you don’t follow me on twitter, then know i am Puerto Rican. although i have my immediate family here in the states. i want to say 98% of my family is in Puerto Rico. ever since the hurricane hit, this has been one of the toughest times. with not knowing about my family for a few days, to then us finding out that yes they are okay and alive but there’s no food and water. being over here and feeling so helpless. it’s a lot to take in. my family also happens to be on the west side which is always forgotten. the town my family is in isn’t even receiving supplies. this whole situation just sucks..let’s not even talk about the president *eye roll* therefore, i wanted to use this platform and let you know that there is a way to help by maybe donating here:

• Unidos Por Puerto Rico (United for Puerto Rico)
• Hispanic Federation

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The Wrap Up’s

i didn’t read much these past two months due to everything that has been going on in my life. i read 3 poetry books and 2 YA novels.

• Stalking Jacking the Ripper (SJTR #1) by Kerri Maniscalco
  A 4 star read for me! This YA Historical Fiction Mystery is definitely a book that I would highly recommend. I loved the story, the setting, the steampunk elements and the mystery. This book was worth every single turned page. I cannot wait to read Hunting Prince Dracula which I am seeing is getting tons of more love. If you click the title of the book, it will lead you to my review =)
• Warcross (Warcross #1) by Marie Lu
  A 5 star and all of the above read!!!! This futuristic YA Sci-Fi novel will set you in a technological advanced world where you get to live in a virtual reality and still live in the real world. This book was definitely a favorite read for 2017. I cannot wait to read the next books!! The title of this book will lead you to my rave review.

each of these poetry books were 5 stars
titles will take you to goodread page

• [redacted] by trista mateer
  “This comes in the form of handwritten notes and poetry fragments, iPhone note poetry, tweets, Craigslist ads, and more. This mix of poetry and prose spans a single month and covers topics such as heartbreak, gender, sexuality, and forgiveness.”
  That’s the goodreads synopsis. Are you convinced yet? You should read it.
• Mad Woman by Kat Savage
  “Mad Woman whish is comprised of 40 pieces that capture her stream on conscious, her confessions, and her strange thoughts. In Mad Woman, she bears it all and embraces her madness driven by loneliness and disappointment.”
  I CRIED SO MUCH WHILE READING THIS BOOK. I FELT LIKE SHE WROTE THIS ONE FOR ME. FOR THE BROKEN GIRLS WHO FEEL LIKE THEY CAN’T EXPRESS THEMSELVES. OMG THIS BOOK!!
• The Last Time I’ll Write About You by Dawn Lanuza
  “Should I be
  Thankful
  Or
  Regretful
  That my only idea
  Of love
  Is
  You?”
  A book filled with heartbreak poetry and words of love and loss. I loved reading this. I was nodding my head with a lot of these poems because I understand the author’s words.

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today so happens to be the 6 month anniversary of love, and you…which i can’t quite believe and i wrote a thing for all of you ❤ if you want to check more on my poetry book, click here.

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and that is all for now. sorry i’m a little all over the place lol. it feels great to be back and i cannot wait to blog hop, check what all of you have been up to. i plan on doing a book haul and book tag soon. maybe post a poem later on this week about my island puerto rico. my heart lays heavy. love you all!

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instagram: @chicnerdreads
twitter: @chicnerdreads

Top Ten Tuesday: Ten book Recommendations for Modern Poetry and Fiction Readers

Top Ten Tuesday is a weekly feature with new topics every Tuesday, hosted by The Broke and The Bookish. If you would like to participate, the link provided will lead you to the feature and upcoming topics for the rest of the month.

Today’s topic is: Ten book recommendations for ______________

I will be splitting this meme into 5 book recommendations for modern poetry and 5 for fiction readers. basically a faves list that everyone should read.

*titles will lead you to Goodreads

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Modern Poetry

• the princess saves herself in this one by amanda lovelace
  poems on women empowerment, feminism, self-reflection
• the chaos of longing by k.y. robinson
  break-up poetry and self-love poetry
• we carry the sky by mckayla robbin
  poems on feminism and uplifting women
• soft magic. by pile chisala
  poems on identity, self-love, self-acceptance
• [redacted] by trista mateer
  loves poems and break-up poetry

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Fiction

• Identical by Ellen Hopins
  a young adult novel written in verse with regards to mental health
• Attachments by Rainbow Rowell
  romance contemporary taking place during the Y2K
• Burying Water (Burying Water #1) by K.A. Tucker
  new adult novel that will gut your soul
• Rooms by Lauren Oliver
  paranormal story all about a haunted house filled with ghost
• Vicious (Villains #1) by V.E. Schwab
  a paranormal book filled with supernatural elements and experimenting.

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that is all for today! let’s chat in the comments! have you heard or read any of these? would love to know!

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Instagram: @chicnerdreads
Twitter: @chicnerdreads

this poem wasn’t planned

i would never
suggest you
trying to be me.

for it is tiring
and sometimes
i cannot wrap
the things that
happen in my
brain.

for i always
feel the sense
of loss and
dream of it
often.

i hurt myself
with my own
thoughts.

i hurt myself
with every
moment i
think about
my past.

and when things settle,
there are times that i
don’t know who i am.
and how i got here.

July Wrap-Up 2017

Always late to the monthly wrap-up party but heyyyyy I’m here!!! This month was slow in the reading department. I had family from Puerto Rico and we went out a lot plus I was getting ready for my first live reading event (I’ll get into that later in the post)!

Monstress, Vol. 1: Awakening by Marjorie M. Liu ★★★★ 
Genre: Graphic Novel, Adult
Finally picked this graphic novel up after it being out for like a year and OMG it was great!! The detailing, the story, the illustrations, the dialogue, the poet references, yessssss!!!! I have a non-spoiler review here.

 

 

 

 

 

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maroon daydreams by Cheyenne Raine ★★★★★ 
Genre: Poetry
Filled with beautiful vivid imagery, this collection of poetry will have you feeling love and light by the end of it. I have a short review with some of the poems here.

 

 

 

 

 

 

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A Darker Shade of Magic (Shades of Magic #1) by V.E. Schwab ★★★★★ 
Genre: Fantasy
After a few years, I finally read this fantastical book and it was amazing!!! I have a non-spoiler review here. I cannot wait to read the rest of the series in September! I miss Kell and Lila Bard, plus all the Londons!

 

 

 

 

 

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Black Bird of the Gallows by Meg Kassel ★★★ 
Genre: YA Paranormal
This book releases September 5th and I wrote a non-spoiler ARC review here. This one was a disappointment to me, I was really looking forward to it. However, if you miss reading books like LUX and Twilight, then I would definitely recommend this one for you.

 

 

 

 

 

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I HAD MY FIRST POETRY READING EVENT AND IT WENT GREAT!!!! It was at Bluestockings Bookstore located in New York City. This even was hosted by an amazing group called La Pluma Y La Tinta. This organization is all about helping PoC writers/poets. They dedicate their events to PoC and I think that’s so great because our voices should be heard just like any other. I got to read alongside other writers!

Special shout out to my twin Lilly @ LairOfBooks for pulling through and showing her support!!! SHE DA BEST!!!!! Check out her super amazing diverse book blog! Why did i just notice that we were both wearing stripes?! *cries laughing* TWINNING!

 

If you want to check out clips from my reading, I did a full thread on Twitter, click here ❤

 

 

 

 

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Poetry Postings:
– my love poems are ghost stories

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and that is all for today’s post! i am hoping that August will be a better reading month since i have officially joined #ARCAugust! what have you book nerds been up to? let’s chat in the comments!

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Instagram: @chicnerdreads
Twitter: @chicnerdreads

maroon daydreams by Cheyenne Raine Poetry Review

Title: maroon daydreams
Author: Cheyenne Raine
Publisher: CreateSpace
Format: Paperback
Rating: 5 out of 5 stars

Synopsis:

maroon daydreams is a collection of poetry that dives into experiences of healing, living life, daydreaming and all the aftermath of decisions we make and wishes we chase after.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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loved this short poetry collection! i thought it was vivid with imagery and the words flowed together beautifully. cheyenne raine divides maroon daydreams into four different sections which are healing, experience, daydreaming, and aftermath. each section has poems centered around the sectioned themes.

what i love most about this collection is the way i felt while reading it and how i felt afterwards. cheyenne raine left me with feelings of hope, love, and self-reflection. she took her emotions and wrote them down with every ounce of her soul.

i thought this collection was very dreamy and magical. i cannot wait to read more by this author!

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some of my personal favorites from the collection:

pressed flowers have dried up in between the journal
entries i created, they have the faintest scent of life. i
once wrote about you and how you managed to create
a resounding echo of bliss in my life. i once found the
words that embodied your untamed spirit and
described your captivating smile. once. now, there
are dead flowers that smell like the rain and small
entries that cannot grasp who you are.

– scent of life

---

i choke on cigarette smoke. i want to leave these
strangers, yet, their stories are so wild and unique.
so, i stay and listen. their eyes close as they
remember who they were and why they were rebels.
my eyes are wide with curiosity, waiting to hear their
words fabricate a tale of good and old times.

– they were rebels

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i will rise,
my fists full of flowers
and my soul full of light.
isn’t is the gentlest of things
that show the most strength?
where the blossoms push through dirt
and the sun illuminates the dark–
there, you will find me.

– fists full of flowers

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you make it easy to
believe in magic and light.
your smile is a million
ocean waves crashing
into my small soul.

– easy to believe

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that is all for this review! cheyenne raine is a self-pub author, please remember to cross review on amazon! it helps us out. let’s chat in the comments!

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Instagram: @chicnerdreads
Twitter: @chicnerdreads

my love poems are ghost stories

my lover, oh lover,
look what you’ve
done to me.
you’ve captured me
and broken my bones.
i have spilt blood
over you, and the
magic in my veins
has dispersed over the
n o t h i n g n e s s
you and i no
longer hold.
the tether to my soul
has been stripped away.

she says as a ghost
while sinking the
ship he is sailing.
she is the raging dark
storm he never saw coming.

you keep taunting me in my dreams.

if i were a ghost,
i wouldn’t haunt you.
i would haunt the
freedoms i never had
while being with you.

the oceans i never saw with you sing to me.